Stout Page 9

  I push my fingers into the top of his hair and arch my back when he moves lower to suck my nipple into his mouth. A soft gasp/moan expels from my chest when his tongue licks the erect point. He sucks it into his mouth and nibbles the tip, sending a whirlwind of messages to my groin. Get ready. You know what’s coming.

  Except I don’t. Because he doesn’t shove me to the bed and push into me quickly.

  The man goes down on his knees instead. Oh, fuck.

  He grasps my ass hard and holds me in place as he kisses me across the top of my pubic bone.

  I close my eyes and concentrate on what he’s doing. Just feeling. Enjoying the pleasure of being touched for the first time in years.

  Four years. That’s almost half of my twenties without the touch of a man.

  Such a shame. A damn waste.

  I jolt when Oliver’s tongue darts out and licks the top of my slit.

  Oh. Fuck. I can tell those two words are going to be common usage tonight.

  My face heats and suddenly throbs with the beat of my heart. As does my clit and he didn’t even touch it. But he was so, so, so close.

  “Sit.”

  I step backward until the backs of my legs touch the bed. I lower myself, then lean back on my hands as he lifts my feet from the floor and hooks them over his shoulders. I may come just seeing him between my legs.

  He doesn’t put his mouth on me as I expect. Instead he uses both hands to rub my groin around the bends of my legs. “Scoot back and lie flat. Breathe deep. Completely relax. This may take a while.” I thought he was going down. Which is what I want very badly. But that doesn’t seem to be what’s about to happen. What is he going to do to me?

  I slide backward and lower my upper body so I’m lying flat on the bed. He taps my hip. “Lift up.”

  He slides one of my pillows under my bottom and my curiosity soars through the roof. I can’t stand not knowing. “What are we doing here?”

  “Having sexy fun. Lots of it.”

  He bends one leg, and then the other, so the soles of my feet are pressed together, my legs frogged apart. “You’re going to enjoy this. Promise.”

  He resumes the kneading motion of my groin, his fingers rubbing up and down the area beside my labial lips. A slow build. It’s like holding a lit match next to the fuse of a bomb, threatening to bring it close enough to light it on fire. Yet, he doesn’t.

  Oliver’s palm forms a cup over the entire area between my legs, his fingertips applying inward pressure on my oh-so-good spot as his hand moves in a circular motion. “That’s it, Max. Rock your hips against me.” Sheez. I didn’t even realize I was moving.

  I reach over my head and grasp the edge of the mattress. And squeeze. I hold on for dear life; I’m soaring so high I’m afraid I’ll float away if I don’t.

  My eyes flutter open when I feel the rhythmic suction of his mouth on my clit. Suck-release. Suck-release. Suck-release.

  “Ohh . . . Ohh.” The sounds coming from my mouth mostly resemble incoherent garble as warm fuzzies pulsate in my lower abdomen in preparation for what’s coming.

  My body simultaneously tenses and relaxes. The two coming together don’t even make sense. Doesn’t have to. It feels too good to argue their cohabitation.

  I put my fingers into his hair and fist the top while I squirm beneath him. Tingly waves of sensation toss and turn deep within my pelvis. An orgasmic storm brewing. And a tornado of moans, groans, and panted breathing leave my mouth when the rhythmic flutters in my pelvis rush back and forth like a raging tide racing in for the shore.

  Oh my God. I’m coming. So hard.

  I close my eyes and surrender to the rhythmic twitching inside me, pulsation in my face, warm flush growing on my chest. They’re all accomplices to the euphoria coursing throughout me.

  A cocktail of those wonderful sexual neurochemicals released by the brain post orgasm hits my veins like an intense dose of heroin. There’s a science behind an orgasm, and it’s a complicated thing I don’t dare to understand. Good thing I don’t need to in order to enjoy it.

  Oliver is already proving to be a take-control kind of lover. It’s what I like. What I crave. What I need to be satisfied.

  A complete alpha. Nothing less will fulfill me and my needs.

  Oliver Thorn

  Adelyn is highly responsive to my touch. I expected sensitivity since she hasn’t had sex in so long, but she exceeded any and all of my expectations.

  Bringing her to orgasm that easily was a beautiful thing. And it won’t be the last time I do it tonight.

  “Shit, that was magnificent.” I press a kiss to her inner thigh but it’s only a brief goodbye. I plan to come back. Soon. And hopefully often if she’ll let me.

  I crawl up her body, kissing the ivory skin over her stomach, breasts, neck. I’m glad she didn’t turn off the light like so many chicks do. And I’m happy she isn’t hiding her scars from me. I love looking at her; she’s stunning. The most beautiful redhead I’ve ever seen.

  She presses her fingers to my lips. “I’ve been looking at this mouth for weeks wondering, fantasizing, about what it would feel like between my legs.”

  “I hope I didn’t disappoint.”

  She rubs her thumb over my bottom lip. “Not possible.”

  Adelyn’s knees are bent, legs apart. Open invitation. My body presses against hers. Nothing between us. It would be so damn easy to forget the condom, enter her, and worry about the consequences later.

  But of course that’s not what I do.

  I stop and grab one of the condoms off the nightstand. Adelyn strains her neck to see over her tits and bites the end of her index finger as she watches me roll on the latex sheath. Her wide-eyed stare makes my cock even harder. Bigger. I feel like a fucking rock star. “Like what you see, Max?”

  “I love what I see but I’d much rather feel it.”

  “Good. It wants to feel you too.” I move from kneeling between her legs to pressing my body on top of hers. She parts her legs wide and my cock finds its way to her entrance without any guidance from my hand. No surprise there.

  I slide into her easily so I go for the deep plunge. All the way. I love the sound of her gasp-then-moan in my ear.

  I feel like I should give her a moment to acclimate to having a dick inside her for the first time in years, but I see it’s unnecessary when she tilts her hips to allow me deeper access.

  “Fuck me, Thorn.” She trembles and closes her eyes tightly while biting her bottom lip.

  Whoa.

  I thought Adelyn would want it slow. Sweet. Gentle. I was prepared to give that to her. But she wants to fuck. Hard.

  No complaints here. Can give her that.

  I drive into her hard and with total domination. Every stroke deliberate. Fierce.

  I move faster and thrust as deeply as her body will allow. Her legs circle my waist but we don’t stay like that long before I grab her thighs and push them back and apart. I move to my knees and sink into her so hard and deep she’ll be reminded all day tomorrow who was here inside her tonight.

  She reaches for my arm and pulls, cueing me to lower my upper body. This position feels great for me but I guess it isn’t the best for her.

  I heed her cue and lie down on top of her again. Her fingers follow the length of my arm until they find my hand. She grips my wrist and brings my palm to her neck.

  It’s an odd position. I have to shift my body so my free arm bears the majority of my weight. No woman wants to be suffocated during sex.

  “Don’t stop. Keep fucking me.”

  “You don’t have to worry about that, baby.” No way I’d stop. Being inside Adelyn Maxwell feels too fucking good.

  She puts her hand on top of mine and places them both on her neck. Our eyes lock as I thrust in and out of her. “Squeeze it.”

  How do I squeeze her hand when it’s on top of mine? “Huh?”

  She repositions my palm around the side of her neck and presses my fingers and hand against her skin. “Hold
me down. Own me. Show me I’m yours in this moment.”

  I slow my thrusts despite how close I am to getting off. Because I’m confused about what’s happening here.

  “Don’t stop. Keep fucking me.”

  I look at my hand, and Adelyn’s, wrapped around her throat. And then I gaze into those pleading hazel eyes. “It’s okay, Thorn. I want you to do it. I need you to.”

  And it clicks.

  Need? No one needs to be choked. And that’s what she’s asking me to do to her.

  I can’t war with myself about this right now. I’m so close to coming. Fuck, I just want . . . to get off. Need it . . . so bad.

  I lower my body and press my forehead against Adelyn’s, my hand still wrapped around her throat, as I slide in and out of her. She uses her hand to tighten my hold on her neck. “I want you to own me. Control me.”

  I tighten my grip, holding Adelyn in place by her throat, and drive into her as I come harder than I have since . . . ever.

  “I’m coming again. So fucking hard.” I feel the vibration of her vocal cords, and it’s a reality check. My hand is wrapped around her lifeline. Squeezing.

  I plunge hard one last time and then sink over Adelyn when the condom is filled and I’m completely empty.

  Fuck. I’ve never gotten off so hard. Never. But what in the hell just happened?

  I lift my face from her shoulder. “What the fuck was that?”

  “Our worlds colliding.” Adelyn grasps the back of my head and pulls me down. Her mouth takes complete possession of mine. Until she smiles and it breaks the contact between our lips. “That was sooo good.”

  She’s happy.

  I can’t argue it being good. Hell, it was fucking awesome. But my big hand was wrapped around her small throat. Squeezing. “Max. I was choking you while we fucked.”

  “I wasn’t choking. Not even a little. I could breathe the whole time.”

  “Why did you ask me to do that?”

  “It’s a huge turn-on for me.” No. She can’t mean that. It’s too fucked up. Choking someone during sex is . . .

  I recall what she said about Martin. He knew shit. Kinky shit. And it was good. I liked it. A-whole-fucking lot. “That sadistic son of a bitch taught you that, didn’t he?”

  “Do you really want to go there?”

  I move off Adelyn, roll to my back, and stare at the ceiling. Contemplating why in the world she asked me to do something like that. “Haven’t you been hurt enough?”

  “I didn’t ask you to hurt me. And you didn’t.”

  She’s wrong if she believes this is a game. “I’ve been choked. To the point of turning blue and passing out. More times than I care to recall. It’s not harmless.”

  “It’s not about cutting off my oxygen to make me pass out.” Adelyn gets up and moves over on top of me. Straddling me. She grabs my wrists, pins my hands over my head. “It’s about this.”

  “Which is what?”

  “Control. And how I feel when you exert your strength over me. Domination. Power. Control. All of it turns me the fuck on.”

  “Why?”

  “There’s something primal and exhilarating about a man who takes complete control in the bedroom. That’s what it’s about for me. I want to feel desire. Real desire. I need a man who will grab me and make me feel small and vulnerable and feminine. Without hurting me.”

  She releases my hands and sits upright, still mounted on top of me. “Outside of the bedroom, it’s all a level playing field. I’m an independent woman, and I control everything in my life. But in the bedroom . . . I want to be controlled by a strong man.”

  “And choked.”

  “I need an alpha male. I crave the dominance and show of strength he has over me.” She reaches for my hands and intertwines our fingers. “You’re the first man I’ve trusted in years. I couldn’t have let anyone else put their hands on me that way. It had to be you.” She releases my hands and leans over me, propping on her lower arms, but her hands grasp my face. She presses a soft, closemouthed kiss on my lips. “Only you, Thorn.”

  She wants an alpha. A controller. A choker.

  God help me, I like what I just did to her. I want to do it again. And that’s totally fucked up.

  I spent my childhood being controlled, dominated, choked. What kind of person does it make me if I do those things to her? Even if it’s what she wants?

  “I can’t, Max.”

  She presses her forehead to mine. “You can. You did.” I did. And it was wrong.

  So. Fucking. Wrong.

  “But not again.”

  “I saw your face. You liked my submission. You liked putting your hand on me like that. You weren’t repulsed. And in those few moments when you held my life in your hands, I belonged to you. I knew it. You knew it. And you liked it.”

  Only a monster could love holding another person’s life in his hands. “You’re confusing me with your last lover.”

  I grasp her hips and move her off me. “Don’t go, Thorn.”

  “Where are my clothes?” She doesn’t answer, but I spot them on her dresser.

  I yank on my underwear. “You shouldn’t have dropped something like that on me without any warning.”

  “I bet you’ve never come so hard in your life.” Lucky guess. “Tell me if I’m wrong.”

  I can’t. To do so would be a lie. “You’re not wrong.”

  “See?” She leaves the bed and comes to me as I’m pulling on my jeans. “We’re good together. And that was only our first time.”

  She kisses my chest and sucks my nipple into her mouth, biting down on it. And my dick spasms. “Imagine what it would be like after we learn how to fulfill one another’s sexual fantasies. Pure ecstasy.”

  How can she feel it would work between us? So confident? Pure ecstasy? Fuck. Probably. But I’m scared as hell to know what her sexual fantasies are if she was brave enough to reveal her choking fetish the first time we’re together.

  I pull my T-shirt on. “I’m sorry but this isn’t going to work for me.”

  She steps away and wraps her arms around herself. Hiding her nudity from me. And I feel like a huge asshole.

  I pick up one of the towels from the floor and wrap it around her. “We’re neighbors. We’re going to see each other. A lot. Where do we go from here?” I don’t want this to be weird. But I don’t know how it won’t be.

  She looks so wounded. I didn’t want to hurt her. Physically or otherwise.

  I think again of her scars. He hurt her. That’s not me. I can’t hurt her on purpose.

  She forms a faux smile accompanied by glassy eyes. “We wave when we pass on the street, and we say hello when we see one another outside, and we resume our lives as they were before this relationship began, and we pretend this night never happened.” She pauses and looks toward the window. She takes a deep breath and adds quietly, “Another secret we add to our collection.”

  Adelyn has come to hold a special place in my life. I don’t want any of those conditions. “No more hanging out? No more anything?”

  She looks at the floor as she shakes her head. “No. I can’t. Not now.”

  “Maybe we break for a day or so and see where things are when the dust settles.”

  I see a tear fall from her cheek to the floor. And she covers her face with the end of the towel. “No.” She shakes her head. “I’m so humiliated I can’t even look at you. Please go.” She shouldn’t feel humiliated. I was unprepared.

  I don’t know what I feel about this yet, but I don’t want to let her go.

  “Max . . .”

  “Just go, Thorn.”

  * * *

  No damn way I can concentrate on work today. Not after last night’s disastrous events with Adelyn.

  It bothers the fuck out of me. All of it. But most of all, I hate knowing that son of a bitch who nearly murdered her taught her that kinky shit. And she likes it.

  I can’t stop imagining some faceless asshole putting his hands around her throat.
>
  What is the fascination with it?

  Why does she like it so much?

  Why did I like doing it to her?

  I turn to the one source who won’t judge me for asking. The web.

  I open a private window on my browser and do a search: choking during sex.

  Choking has become the new third base.

  Inspired by violent pornography.

  Men want a princess in public and a whore in the bedroom.

  Women want a prince in public and a sexual predator in the bedroom.

  Some of the articles and posts I find are disturbing while others are . . . interesting.

  Deep-rooted desires of domination are no longer taboo.

  Stop asking her what she wants. Tell her what to do. Order her around the bedroom like you own her. Issue commands. You are in charge. She exists for your sexual pleasure. She exists to please you.

  Choking is an indicator of your strength as a man. If you are an alpha male, a woman will crave your domination and show of strength.

  Who the fuck writes this shit? And who the fuck does this shit?

  Everything in my upbringing, from the time Mom and Dad got us, taught me this is not the way women should be handled. My parents invested a lot of time teaching me how to treat people respectfully, especially females. They taught me right from wrong and worked hard to undo all the wrong that had been done to me.

  Choking Adelyn feels like I’m doing harm to her. Hurting her. In my mind, nothing could be more wrong.

  Yet these articles claim otherwise. And Adelyn does too.

  “You look exhausted. I’m hoping that’s a sign your date with Adelyn went really great.”

  I jolt at the sound of Lawrence’s voice. Like a kid caught looking at porn. And that’s sort of what it feels like I’m researching.

  I minimize the screen displaying the article “How to Choke a Woman During Sex.” Shit. Lawrence would flip out if she read that heading. Or saw the photo of a sexy couple where the man’s hands are wrapped around a naked woman’s throat.

  “I didn’t get a lot of rest last night.” I couldn’t sleep. All I could think of was the disaster with Adelyn.